March

  1. Listen to old people.
  2. Dear, kale fuck you!
  3. Dear vegans, my ancestors killed yours for fun and danced in the caves.
  4. Learn your fucking history morons. Pick up a book.
  5. Never yell Bomb on a plane. That’s just good life advice.
  6. Yoga pants are for yoga. If men are not allowed to be comfortable wearing boxers in public, then, why should you? OH, wait they look good. Never mind carry on. Nevertheless, seriously stop dressing for the gym at the grocery store.
  7. Men, Yoga pants are for women! No exceptions
  8. Take pride in your education and never let anyone make you feel bad for knowing the answer
  9. Stop dressing like… (Men Only)
  • A pirate
  • A steamboat captain
  • A homeless person
  • You live in your mom’s basement
  • You spend all day playing video games

  1. Men, buy her some flowers, candy or jewelry because you want to and she deserves it. Fuck Valentine’s Day just do it!
  2. Go somewhere fun for a weakened this month.
  3. Drink some fucking Merlot- Here is a list.
  4. Challenge yourself daily
  5. Trivia can keep your mind sharp.
  6. Lay in bed, pour some Whiskey and watch porn with someone special! I recommend Basil Hayden during a nice gangbang scene!
  7. Play some music daily- Take ten minutes to chill to your 3 favorite songs
  8. Or find 3 new songs a week and expand your horizons.
  9. Have a threesome; take your time and enjoy
  10. Say yes to 5 things you normally would say no to.
  11. Have one junk email address and one main one- DELETE all others. Save yourself.
  12. Drink more water; Order water every time you order a drink.
  13. Try to get a little kinky at least once a week!
  14. Drink more Cognac
  15. Go wine tasting in Temecula
  16. Use your tongue for more than just speaking
  17. In keeping with the previous rule- Learn when to shut up
  18. Get back to people with an answer even if it is no. The idea that you can ignore someone until they go away is for assholes.
  19. Love deeply and fuck like you mean it
  20. Do not surrender, or fear defeat learn from it!
  21. Call people back, stop texting someone who calls you
  22. Do not waste time in conversations you do not enjoy.